Leaving a LEGACY

Psalm 127:3-5 New International Version (NIV)

3 Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him.
4 Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one’s youth.
5 Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them.
They will not be put to shame when they contend with their opponents in court.

There are many things I love and cherish in life and I would have to say the top thing would be family. Being an alienated alienated parent there have been many things I have learned in this crazy journey.

Just about 3 weeks ago one of the most important people in my life went through a major open heart surgery; my dad. There have been many times over the past few years I thought I would loose him waking up in the middle of the night from terrible dreams or seeing his health fail, but I will say he is doing well and finally out of the hospital. He is one of the most amazing men I personally know with a wealth of knowledge and strength.

The other day I asked him a question. The question I asked was "If you had the opportunity to hand down to the next generation, before you died, what advice would you give about LEGACY?"

Legacy is far more than just passing down wisdom, talent and expertise to the next generation and it is certainly not about handing down the family business for the success of the family name. Although those things are good and noble items LEGACY is comprised of the 6 letters it spells out.

Life: What we have learned in our time on this earth

Eternity: What has God shown us about the past, present and future

God: How have we seen God and the piece we lived out in His bigger picture.

Achievement: How has what we done made and impact on others

Christian faith:

Did you run the race to win and see God's goodness in the process?

You: What other areas of wisdom would you share to define who you are?

I have been thinking about each one of these areas Life, Eternity, God, Achievements, Christian faith and You on many different levels and came to the realization that LEGACY is all about family and community. It is all about seizing the opportunity to impact the world in a way that when you leave it your children will see the epic firework of your life He has set off and desire to emulate what you have done.

I may not be the perfect Father, but I do know I am the exact father for my kids. There is not a day that goes by that I do not think about them and pray for them and even long for them to be a part of my life, yet I have learned that as long as my eyes are focused on God and that I trust Him in all things that the LEGACY I leave that they will see, pick up the baton and continue the race God has scribed on their hearts and impact others along the way. As I have reviewed a couple things they gave me early on in this alienation process I hold fast to one important thing that I know is not absent of them....."I love you and miss you Daddy."

Happy Father's Day to all the Dads out there!

CAL

The Art of Forgiveness

The Art of Forgiveness

Matthew 18:21-35 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times. “

Earlier this week a friend asked me the very basis of what today's sermon at church just happened to be: 'How do I forgive someone who has violated and victimized me?'

This is such a powerful topic as all of us struggle with it at some point in life. Maybe you struggle forgiving one who borrowed money but has not paid you back or maybe the infraction is far worse like unfaithfulness in a marriage, abuse or taking the life of a loved one, we all struggle with forgiveness but how do we get to the point of forgiving someone who we feel doesn't deserve it by the actions they have made? To understand this we must understand what forgiveness truly is.

What is forgiveness I think is what should be asked. I love this definition of forgiveness:

"Forgiveness is the intentional and voluntary process by which a victim undergoes a change in feelings and attitude regarding an offense, lets go of negative emotions such as vengefulness, with an increased ability to wish the offender well."

Forgiveness is a life long process that is a choice. It is not something that we can just do and move on rather it is an intentional act that we must choose each day. There are some days it is easy yet other days we may get consumed by the injustice at hand. When the lack of forgiveness consumes our very thoughts it becomes a distraction that becomes our central focus where we loose a semblance of those things which are good, true and just. It becomes a distraction where we struggle to function in a proper way; in the greater plan God calls us to live. The lack of forgiveness also locks us in chains where the closest friends we end up having are victimization on the right and depression on the left, but breaking those chains frees us from victimization and depression where we can live life to the full.

Jesus continued in Matthew 18 with an example of what unforgiveness can do to someone:

Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand bags of gold was brought to him. Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt. “At this the servant fell on his knees before him. ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back everything.’ The servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go. “But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred silver coins. He grabbed him and began to choke him. ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ he demanded. “His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay it back.’ “But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. When the other servants saw what had happened, they were outraged and went and told their master everything that had happened. “Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ In anger his master handed him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”

Early on in my divorce I struggled with forgiveness. I was more concentrated on 'why' my ex did what she did and tried to make sense of what may make no sense rather than giving the issue to God and trust Him to deal with that which I didn't understand. In doing so I found that forgiveness was something not in my vocabulary or at least at the level God calls us to do and made me very frustrated. I had to stand back and understand the very basis of forgiveness: my trust in God.

It lead to one simple question 'Do I trust God in all things?' At my church we do a benediction were it is simply put 'we are called to live an upward, inward outward life.' It was not until I understood to full scope was I able to understand the full scope of forgiveness. Early on I felt that it was maybe a bit corny only to understand that this is so tied to forgiveness I could not believe I found a necessary key that I was starting to put together yet didn't fully grasp.

Let me explain a little more in depth what an upward, inward, outward life means.  We are called to be

-Upward: we are in tune with our relationship with God. Without a proper relationship with God it is impossible to forgive. When our relationship is in tune with God we have the ability to trust His goodness, His plan for our lives and the love He has for us. As a parent your love for your children is unconditional. We love them regardless of their choices and actions yet as a child we feel we are entitled to as we do or make excuses for wrong or hold onto our grudges as we have been violated but as a parent we cover our kids with grace and compassion so we can teach them how to live a right life and be that example of forgiveness of grace to others. So if we as parents desire our children to learn the lesson of grace and forgiveness just imagine how much more God desires for us to learn that by forgiving us.

Inward: It is not until we learn what God has done for us can we understand the inward transformation. There are many times we may understand God's grace and forgiveness yet are unable to forgive others simply because we cannot forgive ourselves. We each carry around a bag of broken pieces but don't realize that God can take those colored shards of glass and make an epic stained glass window that will reflect His light through in order to show you beauty through your brokenness. Carrying around our brokenness can be the number one stumbling block where forgiveness for others cannot happen and can be the root of bitterness towards another.

Outward: After we understand God's forgiveness and be able to forgive ourselves and go through the healing process needed for our brokenness can we forgive and love others. Through the understand of brokenness, healing and forgiveness we are given a gift that frees others from the bondage and chains of unforgiveness.

We are called to Love God fully, Love ourselves correctly then Love others compassionately (upward, inward, outward).

One thing I have been reminded over the past many years is something that happened more than 13 years ago. It was the birth of my youngest son. Seeing he would be my last child I wanted to name him as a testament of God's grace. Even 13 years later I marvel at what God put on my heart then and how true my boy is today with God's promise. I know some would think I was silly for naming my son to have the initials "JC," but I felt that was important. His name means "God heard my prayer and has become my salvation." When we learn God's forgiveness it is then that we can understand He has also become our deliverer breaking those chains that have tied us to bitterness and victimization.

What is holding you down where you are struggling with unforgiveness? Can you forgive that person today and tomorrow and the next day to see what God can do in and through you?

CAL

Learning to Be Content-

Philippians 4:12-14

"Actually, I don’t have a sense of needing anything personally. I’ve learned by now to be quite content whatever my circumstances. I’m just as happy with little as with much, with much as with little. I’ve found the recipe for being happy whether full or hungry, hands full or hands empty. Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the One who makes me who I am. I don’t mean that your help didn’t mean a lot to me—it did. It was a beautiful thing that you came alongside me in my troubles."

So today the lesson plan for my Second Graders was on contentment.

It is so easy to either be disappointed by what we don't have or jealous of what someone else has and we don't. I find it ironic that this came on Mother's Day when some may be grieving as a result of not being with their kids or estranged in some fashion.

The lesson plan talked about how God gives us a box not for identity rather that those things we contain may be poured out to illustrate God's grace and the bigger plan He has for us. As a result I took a box, which my youngest son used to use as the house for his stuffed dog, and filled it with those things we may use as our identity and false security of contentment.

In the box I included items that people run to in order to find their identity with meaning. I included vitamins (health), camera (memories), a tape measure (our job), a iPad (knowledge) and a picture of my kids (family), but there is a bigger picture and it doesn't mean that these things are bad only that the are not our identity. We have been talking for weeks about being a Hope Dealer leading to the tee shirt. In being a Hope Dealer we can be poured out to give something of value to others (candy).

Where is your identity found? Is it in those things in your box or is it found in the hope we find in Christ? When we turn our focus on God we are able to be poured out to give to others and in return those things in our box find deeper meaning as our eyes are fixed on Christ.

Find your identity in Christ and all these things will be added to you!

CAL

"Celebration of Life"

Luke 2:10-14

"But the angel said to them, 'Don't be afraid! I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; He is the Messiah, the Lord. This will be a sign to you: Your will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.'

Suddenly a great company of the Heavenly hosts appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, 'Glory to God in the highest heaven, and on earth PEACE to those on whom His favor rests."

Matthew 21:7-9

"They brought the donkey and the colt and placed their cloaks on them for Jesus to sit on. A very large crowd spread their cloaks on the road, while others cut branches from the trees and spread them on the road. The crowds that went ahead of Him and those that followed shouted, 'Hosanna to the Son of David! Blessed is He who comes in the name of the Lord! Hosanna in the highest Heaven!"

With Christmas just a couple days away I have been preparing myself for one of my favorite holidays. There are many fond memories and many not so good, but what's better than preparing for something that can bring you peace, joy and excitement all in one like Christ's coming. I know it may sound a little clique but have you ever thought about that first Christmas that has changed history, changed mankind, our calendar and changed how we think.

Yes I understand that not everyone believes in Christ as the only way to God, that He existed or that He is the Messiah, but imagine for just one second if an angel visited you. What would you do? Imagine if the sky broke into harmonious sounds and voices at the birth of a baby. Would you pass out or be terrified? I know I would. 

Even for those who don't believe, think about this, have you ever seen someone come into the world being celebrated with such great fan fair only to die with the same type of great fan fair. If someone is celebrated in death it is usually because people want them gone, but this was a man who was celebrated at His birth, near His death and after His resurrection.  There is certainly something about that I must say.

So as I was thinking about the celebrations of Jesus at His birth, death and resurrection I could only think about one thing; praise. If praise and worship entered in peace, joy, glory and the Messiah into the preamble of what was to come, imagine what would happened if we invited the Prince of Peace, the God of Glory, the Joy of Life and the Messiah into our day and into each situation with praise how different things would be. Would He be the Peace in your broken family? Would He be the joy where death was consuming every thought? Would He be the Glory that clothes you when you feel like a failure and not worthy? Would He be Messiah or Promise when all hope seems gone?

It is through praise that mountains in our lives are moved, hearts changed, peace comes and promises fulfilled.

As I have been enjoying some new Christmas music this year, a few new songs have charged me and excited me even more this year about the life and legacy of a baby who is God incarnate where all I can do is praise Him. One such song is from Danny Gokey called "Lift Up Your Eyes." It is one of those powerful songs that reminds me of the angels saying "Glory to God in the highest" as it reminds me of the exact same words "Hosanna in the Highest Heaven. Blessed is He who comes in the name of the Lord."

Have you taken the time in all of the busyness to praise God and see what is about to happen?

http://youtu.be/cxd-J28bBbM

CAL

"Three Wisemen & a Princess"

"Three Wisemen & a Princess"

The Holidays can be very hard for some, but for parents of Parental Alienation it is a mater of loneliness, depression and confusion. "What am I supposed to do? What do my kids expect? Do they think about me? How should I be feeling and dealing with the absence of my kids?" are just some of the questions you may ask. I know what that is like because it has been 6 years since I celebrated a Christmas with my kids and over 2 years since I have seen or talked to them. I miss them so deeply and words cannot explain.

Each year I send my kids things to remind them how much they mean to me and that they are precious in every way.

In Dedication to the A-Team (Courtney, Caleb, Noah & Jadon)-

For several weeks I have been racking my brain to figure out something special to do for you this Christmas, above and beyond to show you my love and adoration to you. A few weeks ago I thought about putting together a new story for you like old times, but the combination of things going on and finding an appropriate story line was baffling…. Until today!

I was given the opportunity to share something on the radio with you for Christmas, but thought what better than to present you with but a new story from “The Adventures of Cal-Boy Kitty and Noey Joey.”

Many may wonder what that is. Well when I went to put my kids to bed I would make up stories with them as the main characters that go through life adventures and conquer issues that may be challenging. Many times I would fall asleep while telling the story as they would be riveted enough to wonder what was next. With each story, every night, I would sign off with them saying, “I love you. Care for you. And pray for you.” But my daughter would have me give her an Eskimo Kiss after each line. As she would rub her nose next to mine she would start to giggle and at the end say “nothing” standing for nothing more and I trust your love.

So without further ado……

From “The Adventures of Cal-Boy Kitty & Noey Joey” Comes:

“The Three Wisemen and a Princess”-

It was a cold and wintery night. Cal-Boy KT and Noey Joey were sitting around the table drinking a peppermint hot chocolate and talking to their friends Doctor Dijaboo and Princess Nicky about something that they heard earlier that day. The whole town was abuzz about someone who was to have a baby that could heal the broken hearted, bring restoration and more importantly, purpose and meaning to life. They were puzzled though how a baby could do this. “Is this someone that when you touch them that you are healed from a sickness or is it someone with a word that can calm the storms of life?” Cal-Boy KT declared.

They were so confused, but as night fell they became very tired and fell asleep. Each one of them had a dream that was different than the next. So the following morning they discussed what they saw but puzzled by its meaning. Princess Nicky told the boys, “I had a dream last night about hearing music and seeing instruments playing the most beautiful melodies I have ever heard. I kept trying to tell other people and ask them if they heard the music as well, but they told me that there was no music and that maybe it was all in my head. I got so frustrated that I stopped telling others what I saw and heard.”

Next Dr. Dijaboo spoke up and said “I had a dream too that I cannot make sense of. I saw a present that was wrapped and had my name on it. When I looked closer I saw everything that people told me I could not do written on the outside. I hesitantly grabbed the box and opened it. When I did the whole inside was a mirror and written on the mirror were names like beautiful, strong, creative, important and special. I did not know what to think as the outside had negative things written on it but the inside had positive things.”

Being the competitive spirit Cal-Boy KT is and not wanting to be outdone said, “I had a dream as well. In my dream there was a war going on. I looked for a place to hide and tried to escape the gunfire. It was then that I heard a voice that told me ‘Get up and fight on as this is the most important fight of your life. It may be hard but in the end it is rewarding.’ Then I woke up.”

After the first three shared their dreams they each looked and Noey Joey and asked him if he had a dream. He said “Yes and I don’t want to talk about it.” After several minutes of coxing he shared his dream. He said “I really do not understand what I saw, but it was a lighthouse and a big storm was raging trying to blow out the light. It was my job to make sure the light never went out. Then after several hours of trying to protect the light from the storm a peace came over everything and the storm stopped.”

Puzzled by their dreams they decided to set out on a journey to find this baby that some called ‘Magical.’ After several days they became very tired and wondered if the journey was even worth it. It was in this little town, poor, without running water and very secluded they came upon a person talking about a baby who was born. With great excitement they ask this person where this baby was and they were led to this little house tucked away in the woods. It was very dark as the shadows from the trees blocked out the light of the moon. As they tapped on the door a young couple answered the door and to their surprise this little house was filled with light and joy so great it was like nothing they ever seen before. They opened up their bags to share that which they had with the new family. One pulled out a couple of gold coins, another pulled out some herbs used for healing, while another pulled out some fresh perfume. Dr. Dijaboo unlike the others had nothing to give but his last Swiss Miss Peppermint Hot Chocolate mix and left it with the family.  He was really embarrassed as he felt that it didn’t have as much value as the other gifts, but the couple was very appreciative with what the Three Wisemen and Princess Nicky shared with them. The group had said their goodbyes and could not get over how happy they were to have seen this little baby, the parents and share what they had.

Later that night they each had another dream, but this was a voice who told them what they had seen in their previous dream. To Princess Nick she heard a voice say “The music you heard is what I wrote on your heart. Do not hide it away because others cannot hear it on their own. I wrote it on your heart that you may teach others to hear the music I gave to them that they may experience My full joy.” As for Cal-Boy KT he too heard a voice telling him “I made you strong not to hide away but to defeat evil. The strength you need though can only come through Me. Do not be afraid for I am with you.”

Dr. Digaboo could not control what he dreamed about. He said “I had the same dream all over again but as I kept reading the words written on the mirror the words on the outside kept falling off until the outside was clean beautiful paper. I looked back at the mirror and saw myself and realized that ‘I’ am beautiful. ‘I’ am strong creative….” Then he broke down and started to cry as he quietly said “I am special.”

Before he know it Noey Joey put his arm around him and gave him a hug. He quietly shared with the others what he saw. He said “I am the lighthouse that God started the fire on. In the storms I my remember that others see me as a refuge and a place of peace and rescue. I must always seek God and trust that He will use me to shine His light.”

After Noey Joey was done speaking they realized that this baby on a cold winter night made all the difference to three wise men and a princess who were willing to seek out something special, give what they had and trust God with who He made them to be.

The moral of the story is…..we all have something to give. We all have a calling and we all can make a difference in the lives of others.

To the A-Team, thank you for being my inspiration, my kids and God’s blessing. Live out His fullness in your life and know I am grateful for you and very proud of you. “I love you, care for you and pray for you……Nothing.”

Love Dad

Land of the Free, Home of the Debased

July 4, 2015

Many may ask the question of 'Where did family values in our country go?'

In light of the of the Supreme Court Ruling on Gay Marriage many may be asking the question how did we get here? This is not about the issue of fire and brimstone on the gay lifestyle rather about the denigration of morality in our country.

The problem we have is the compromise of the morals we have established from generation to generation. The things we find acceptable today some may find extremely course 20 to 50 years ago.

To understand this a little more you must look at the history of our country, especially over the past 65 years.

Here are some things in media that have brought such controversy with the morals of our society.

• In the late 1950's and early 1960's anything to do with sex, any sexual terms or talking about pregnancy were topics not to be discussed publicly and certainly not in media of any sort. As a result the producers of the "I Love Lucy" show decided that they wanted to increase their ratings and found that the only way to do so was to push the edge of two topics......sharing the same bed and pregnancy. During that time period it was not acceptable to share the same bed with someone of the opposite sex unless it were for procreation, even for married couples. During the time period most couples would sleep in two separate twin sized beds. In the show the producer decided to take a norm and change things for what was to come with the pregnancy of Lucille Ball and Dessie Arnez and the expectation of their first child. The only way they could keep the show going without the lack of acceptance of the pregnancy of scorn to the character of Lucy and Dessie was to introduce the bedroom seen followed up with the episode called "Lucy goes to the Hospital." Both episodes started controversy and talk yet opened to door to a new social norm.
• In the early 60's a Methodist born man came to the scene which changed the way society would look on to sex forever. After finding out that his first wife cheated on him while he was in the military, Hugh Hefner found himself engaged with multiple partners at the request of his wife who hoped it would even the playing field for the guilt she had and reconcile their relationship. Instead of reconciling the relationship it dissolved the relationship creating the largest empire of magazines about sex. It had opened up a new door and new conversation spurring on the "sexual revolution." It was through the sexual revolution that the promotion of sex outside of marriage, public nudity, homosexuality and the integration of multiple partners started and was the beginning of the acceptance of a new era.
• As the demonization of smoking was in full force starting in the '80's, a new product was to take a new debut. In the early 80's the AIDS epidemic had started to come to light. Many in the medical field attributed AIDS & HIV to homosexuality, which later was learned as a result of a few issues. As a result 'safe sex' was being promoted, but during the Reagan and Bush eras the promotion of sexual contraceptives were banned from mainstream TV. In the early '90's William Jefferson Clinton became president of the United States. One of his promises was to promote 'safe sex.' It was not as a result of Mr. Clinton being president that contraceptives or ed medications were made, as they existed before his presidency, rather the public commercialization of contraceptives and ed medications. Throughout the years of Bill Clinton as president the promotion of the 'safe sex' campaign was carried out by both Mr. Clinton and his wife Hillary (barring his escapades with Jennifer Flowers and Monica Lewinski). Mrs. Clinton made appearances in China talking against population control and promoting contraceptives in lieu. 

Just this past June the in 2015 the US Supreme Court ruled in a decision of 6-3 about the Definition of Marriage whereto the majority stated that no state has the right to define that marriage is between one man and one woman rather the consent of one person to another regardless of sex. It is a ruling which requires all states to accept, regardless of the vote of the people or the laws of the state may dictate. It was a law that opens the door to several questions. The first being,due to the generalization of the ruling, what constitutes to consent of one person to another? Does that restrict age or multiple partners? Does the ruling give way to one person marrying another who has dementia or who has a medical issue where they can be taken advantage of for monetary gain.

The greatest concern about the ruling from the Supreme Court is less about homosexuality and more the issue of the voice of the people being lost. Greater still is the apathy of the elected politicians who have looked at a ruling from a court only to say "well we did all we can do and need to move on to the next item" ignoring the people they represent and have no moral compass in order to just throw in the towel.

Over the past 6, almost 7 decades, we have come a long way. We have given ground inch by inch that over a matter of time we have lost the very principles we once stood for. Over time we are just a hazy reflection of our past as the things that once made us blush or shamed for the purpose of getting us to do right has now become the status quo removing the urgency for a moral standard.

Many people love to bring up the story of Sodom and Gomorra yet many have no understanding why the two cities were truly destroyed. Many assume it was because of homosexuality using it as the opposition for the ruling by the Supreme Court. To understand the true meaning of the destruction of Sodom and Gomorra you must understand what was going on before it's destruction.

About 4000 years ago Lot, nephew of Abraham, ventured out to find a new place to live with his uncle. As a result of the live stock and families of both parties resources became scarce and they decided to split up. As a young man the appeal of a plush and thriving city became the choice of Lot. Now the family was a God fearing family but as a result of the provisions Lot took part in, Lot began to assimilate and found himself compromising his morals and beliefs. Some scholars believe that Lot was a politician in the city and instead of making a positive influence he turned a blind eye to those things which were immoral and unacceptable (Genesis 11-19). It is hard to say how long Lot resided there but it is known that before he left with Abraham to the time he left Sodom he had become married, had children and his children were married.

Just prior to the destruction of Sodom and Gomorra an angel of the Lord came to Abraham telling him that He was going to destroy Sodom and Gomorra, where Lot resided. Abraham pleaded with God that if he could find 50 godly men all of the way down to 1 godly man that God would save the city, God agreed yet none where found including Lot. It shows that if Lot had not compromised his morals, his influence could have saved others in the process. As a result of the lack of morals,which included homosexuality, and Lot's willingness to send his own daughters over to be used sexually God destroyed Sodom and Gomorra.

The question remains are we too like Lot where we have compromised our moral base giving up what we stand for only to find our country lacking each day at a greater basis our character and the very things we once stood for and were founded on? Are we the ones to turn a blind eye or use the excuse to give up the fight for what we believe in and the moral compass for future generations? Are we willing to give excuse or reason our morals away as result of someones claimed rights?

Remember we all have rights as we all have responsibilities.  With every right comes the sacrifice of someone else's liberty. With the sacrifice of someone's liberty comes the compromise of another's morals. With the compromise of someone's morals comes the denigration of the family. And with the denigration of the family comes the loss of tomorrow's generation.

CAL

“I’m Falling Apart…..Can Anyone Help?”

May 24, 2015

“I’m Falling Apart…..Can Anyone Help?”

Luke 17:11-13

^11-13 It happened that as he made his way toward Jerusalem, he crossed over the border between Samaria and Galilee. As he entered a village, ten men, all lepers, met him. They kept their distance but raised their voices, calling out, “Jesus, Master, have mercy on us!”

Earlier this week I was listening to Greg Laurie. He was talking about leprosy (also known as Hanson’s disease).  As I was listening to the symptoms I could not help but see a parallel to Parental Alienation.

What is Leprosy?

Leprosy is a disease that attacks the central nervous system that creates numbness and deformities in parts of the body.

Symptoms:

• Loss of feeling
• Scars and bruises
• Fatigue
• Deformities
• Discoloring of skin and infection
• Deterioration
• Highly Contagious
• Can take a long time to show symptoms
• Loneliness
• Abandonment
• Outcast
• Destitute

As I looked at this list I could not help but think that the symptoms are very much the same in Parental Alienation. 

Here are some of the symptoms of PA:

• Loss of feeling
• Scars and bruises
• Deformities of character
• Infection of the soul
• Fatigue
• Deterioration of Hope
• Can take a long time to show symptoms because of the long court battles and confusion of what is going on.
• Loneliness
• Abandonment
• Outcast
• Destitute

Think about it, Parental Alienation is the leprosy of the soul. It takes everything from you on top of the relationship with your children; money, friends, trust, hope, a sense of being and your character. People don’t want to be around you. The courts mock you and rob you blind. And the worst is you feel all alone.

Just like those in third world countries and ancient times the pain of what they were dealing with because of leprosy was one thing, but the pain of rejection and ridicule was different and soul killing. Likewise those who have experienced the separation of a child by the hands of a disgruntled spouse or unforgiving court is much the same. You find yourself not being able to feel and like you have lost a limb. If the pain wasn’t bad enough you may find you can’t find one person who would be there to give you hope and comfort.

Just like the lepers you find yourself calling out saying “I’m falling apart, can someone help me?” Day in and day out you call out to no avail. Today seems like it is another day without hope and reeling in the paralyzing pain, but wait! Someone is coming! Could today be the day that someone would share just a kind word or give me some hope? Then there it is, that compassionate voice telling you that you are made whole and restored and show yourself to those who can testify to your change.

As the scripture continues it says the most outsider of the outsiders came back to give thanks to Christ. Christ took note of it and said you are restored by your faith and saved as a result.

We are looking for a shoulder to be there for use and most of the time we may get a glimpse at time to time, but very rarely could another person give us that hope or comfort as they too are broken.

In the song “Shoulders,” by For King and Country, they talk about how God carries us through those hard times. As they say in one of the lines that God has come to make things whole.

You mend what once was shattered
And You turn my tears to laughter
Your forgiveness is my fortress
Oh Your mercy is relentless

Imagine if through your calling of brokenness you find someone who has mercy and compassion for your situation, not to take it away but to see you through? Would it restore your hope? Would you celebrate where you came from and be forever grateful? Christ has come to your camp that others have forgotten, where the courts have condemned you and where all hope has seemed lost and has said “You are restored and made whole!”

Challenge: Never lose hope. Share with others those little victories to strengthen your faith and be whole.

CAL

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TfiYWaeAcRw