As I have been going down an amazingly, incredibly, difficult journey over the past couple years and even more intensely over the past few months, God keeps talking to me about the story of the Prodigal Son, but not from the son's position rather from the Father's position.
The story starts in Luke 15-
The Story of the Lost Son
11-12Then he said, "There was once a man who had two sons. The younger said to his father, 'Father, I want right now what's coming to me.'
12-16"So the father divided the property between them. It wasn't long before the younger son packed his bags and left for a distant country. There, undisciplined and dissipated, he wasted everything he had. After he had gone through all his money, there was a bad famine all through that country and he began to hurt. He signed on with a citizen there who assigned him to his fields to slop the pigs. He was so hungry he would have eaten the corncobs in the pig slop, but no one would give him any.
17-20"That brought him to his senses. He said, 'All those farmhands working for my father sit down to three meals a day, and here I am starving to death. I'm going back to my father. I'll say to him, Father, I've sinned against God, I've sinned before you; I don't deserve to be called your son. Take me on as a hired hand.' He got right up and went home to his father.
20-21"When he was still a long way off, his father saw him. His heart pounding, he ran out, embraced him, and kissed him. The son started his speech: 'Father, I've sinned against God, I've sinned before you; I don't deserve to be called your son ever again.'
22-24"But the father wasn't listening. He was calling to the servants, 'Quick. Bring a clean set of clothes and dress him. Put the family ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Then get a grain-fed heifer and roast it. We're going to feast! We're going to have a wonderful time! My son is here—given up for dead and now alive! Given up for lost and now found!' And they began to have a wonderful time.
25-27"All this time his older son was out in the field. When the day's work was done he came in. As he approached the house, he heard the music and dancing. Calling over one of the houseboys, he asked what was going on. He told him, 'Your brother came home. Your father has ordered a feast—barbecued beef!—because he has him home safe and sound.'
28-30"The older brother stalked off in an angry sulk and refused to join in. His father came out and tried to talk to him, but he wouldn't listen. The son said, 'Look how many years I've stayed here serving you, never giving you one moment of grief, but have you ever thrown a party for me and my friends? Then this son of yours who has thrown away your money on whores shows up and you go all out with a feast!'
31-32"His father said, 'Son, you don't understand. You're with me all the time, and everything that is mine is yours—but this is a wonderful time, and we had to celebrate. This brother of yours was dead, and he's alive! He was lost, and he's found!'"
As I have sat and pondered the scope of this story I realized a couple things that happened with the father. Being a father and knowing what it is like to be married, love deep and being divorced this story hits me very hard. You see the father let his son go allowing himself to take on the rejection. He didn't try to reason, beg or plead with his son. Instead he found that he was willing to release his son whether it was for rebellion, defiance, hatred, bitterness or selfishness. Christ does not tell us what the reason for the son leaving other than he just left.
As you read on the father never gave up hope on his son. Instead he proceeded in preparation for his return. I know that the father anguished over his son's decision because he understood the pain his son would be experiencing as well as the pain and problems his sin would entail.
With the way the father responded to his son it is evident that he thought exhaustively about his son. He may have many nights where he tossed and turned praying to God for his return. Maybe he even thought about going out to look for him. What did he do though? He waited for his son's return. When it happened his return was more amazing than one could imagine. In fact the father described it as if his son where dead; he was lost and now found.
Going through divorce and in some ways having a loved one die this feeling can be very well share. Maybe your spouse walked out the door telling you that they wanted what is rightfully theirs. Maybe you are the surviving spouse who the night before their passing ended up in a fight only to find that they are now gone.
Regardless the position the heart is still the same; as longing for your loss. There is a deep desire to right a wrong or a struggle to have avoided the outcome.
Again look at the Prodigal Son's father. He was at a loss. He never gave up on his son. Instead he longed for that reunion again one day and prepared for that time.
I implore you, as I must do as well in my loss, not to give up hope. Do not allow this loss to trap you into the unknown loosing sight of both God's goodness and one of His most important names; "I Am."
Understand I say what I do through the more than 5 losses to me this year. I know too well the pain, the sorrow, the sleepless nights and yes even those times of "God do you hear me and understand my broken heart?"
The only way I can make it, is by knowing that He is my hope and strength. No matter how grime your situation God's plans are still true and planned before your existence. This includes the restoration in brokenness, loss, pain, rejection and yes even divorce and death.
Understand that healing and restoration do not happen over night but over time.
To those struggling with death, rest assured that God has not forgotten you. It is in your pain that God's glory shines through you and a hope on the other side of this life is there.
For those who struggle with the loss through divorce, there is hope. Prepare for what God has in store as it will blow your mind with what He will do. Never give up on your spouse or family as they are now in God's hands and you are called to love and forgive through the process.
For those whose child has rejected them, get ready for their return. Someone who knows Godly standards cannot run far for God's hand. As God's Word says "He will turn the hearts of the father back to their children." Likewise God can and will turn the hearts of the children back to their father. A child always desires the approval and blessing of their father regardless.
Stand strong in preparation of His restoration and the eventual return of the one who is gone. God will make all things new again and in doing so much better than you can prepare.
